Fitting in at a Japanese workplace

from the 5/01 paper Ibaraki Report

Prime Minister (as of the time of printing) Mori recently took another relentless beating by the Japanese press for ditching an important engagement with the royal family of Norway. While he claimed he was suffering from back pain and thus could not attend, reporters caught him pounding away at sake with two young members of parliament in a hideaway sushi bar. Caught in a Clintonesque lie? Well, not quite. Mori claimed that in this situation, networking in a dinner setting is the right thing to do.

Enkai (宴会): inebriation, stress relief, and a little networking

No one ever said that networking involving food and beverages doesn't exist in other countries. But for most Western countries, it is done at stand-up receptions while ferocious business card exchanging takes place. While there may be an open bar, almost no one gets drunk. And nobody talks about himself or herself because no one acts like himself or herself.

A Japanese enkai involves a sit-down session of non-stop eating and drinking (more on that later). Business cards are exchanged in earlier official meetings, and almost everyone gets drunk, therefore spilling their beans about their personal lives.

I'll spare you the graphic details that result from a wild night out at an enkai, but thanks to a handbook published by the Council of Local Authorities for International Relations (CLAIR or 自治体国際化協会), I can give you a crash course in enkai etiquette.

• Wait for others to sit down before you do
• Wait for the kanpai (toast or 乾杯) before you drink
• When offered a drink, hold up your glass and take a token sip (or pretend to) before putting the glass down on the table again. Immediately serve the person back. It is not good to serve your own drink. Pouring drinks for each other is a way of showing appreciation for others' efforts. It is not polite to decline if you are offered a drink even if your glass is full. At these times, take a small sip from your glass and let the other person fill it up again.
• Non-drinkers: People who do not drink alcohol should make it known at the beginning of the engagement. It is unusual (except for those driving) to not drink a little, so non-drinkers may be asked why they do not drink . . . repeatedly. Just be polite and keep to your reasons. The same goes for vegetarians, particularly, vegans.
• Drinking and driving is illegal and heavily punished

If you got a little chuckle out of just reading these points, you're bound to get a kick out of the real thing. You can study the Japanese language and culture all you want but I say the best way of immersing yourself in Japanese culture is to do the enkai thing, at least once.

Pouring your senpai's drink

Shime (締め): a ritual that signals the (unofficial) end of the enkai

Just when you've got a nice little buzz going, most enkais will come to an abrupt end, most times after 1½ or 2 hours. Trust me, you'll know when it ends because a senior member of the group will lead a ritualistic chorus that involves clapping (shime or end). As a part of the Kanō region, albeit often ignored by other Kanōites, Ibarakian enkais often end with a "Kanō Ippon-Jime"(or 関東一本締め). If you're feeling out of place because you don't know what the series of claps are, the Kanō Ippon-Jime is your kind of thing. Even the most plastered partygoer can master this single clap shime.

If you feel like you were forced to attend the enkai in the first place, you're free to make your exit after the shime. After all, the drunken-enkai scene is not for everyone (even for some Japanese).

Nijikai, sanjikai, yojikai (二次会、三次会、四次会) . . . the party after the party

Even if you're not dragged by your boss to head to a nijikai (second party), most enkai-goers wind up at one anyway. The initial enkai is often wound a little tight because one must always be aware of office politics. If you're low on the totem pole, this means that you'll be constantly bowing to and pouring the drinks of you're bosses or senpais (先輩), in the ever so painful seiza (正座, sitting straight with your legs folded under you) position no less.

So for those that require a more relaxed party atmosphere to unwind from the original enkai, and for those who feel the need to feed their mild buzz a little bit more booze, a nijikai is just what the doctor ordered. Be careful of overdoing it though, as "unwinding" means more than booze for most Japanese. When your mild buzz becomes full-out drunkenness, you'll probably be up for a third (sanjikai), or even a fourth party (yojikai), assuming your budget allows it. Pace yourself and drink responsibly! Try to avoid sake-chugging contests in 3-minute intervals.

Karaoke (カラオケ)

The most popular nijikai destination is karaoke. Surely you know what karaoke is. Just like "sushi" (寿司) and "sumō" (相撲), the word "karaoke" has become a universal word, even if it is pronounced "care-ee-oh-kee" by most westerners. The word karaoke originates from two words: kara (empty 空) and okesutora (orchestra オケストラ).

Even though most foreigners know what karaoke is, many haven't experienced the real thing before coming to Japan. Most Japanese karaoke establishments consists of exclusively private rooms or "karaoke boxes," so the only people who get to find out that you're no Utada Hikaru are the people in your party. If you're too embarrassed to sing and need some liquid courage, try ordering the all-you-can-drink plan (nomihōdai or 飲み放題). It worked for my first time.

From Green Day to Disney theme songs and Holly Cole to Metallica, most places have a wide selection of English songs, and the only excuse that will get you out of singing is, well, if there isn't a wide selection of English songs.

Handy tips for an enkai rookie

• If you want to avoid going out with a certain person or boss for the next party, it may be a good idea to plan a nijikai in advance with those you get along with. Make a quick exit right after the original enkai.
• Make sure you're carrying enough cash for the night because, as most of you are already aware, bank machines close at 7ish and most food and drink establishments rarely accept credit cards.
• If you're not eating or drinking as much as others, don't expect to pay just for what your share was. It's common practice to split the bill evenly, although some enkais are now adopting a payment system of giving price breaks for women.
• Since you're not supposed to pour your own drink, there may be times when you've got an empty glass. If you are in need of a drink and no one is offering, pick up the bottle and offer someone else a drink and they will surely return the favor.
• No drinking straight out of 633ml beer bottles, no calling your boss by his or her first name, no animal noises, no dancing on tables, and no getting naked!